One of the great things about the technology is its ability to make the world converge in on itself. Every technological development makes the world a bit smaller.

Think about it. There are social networks where you can connect with 200+ of your closest friends and peer into their electronically enhanced lives. There you are, connected with a ‘friend’ from high school who you haven’t seen in 20 years and who used to slam your locker and knocks your books out of your arms in the hallway. Now they’re positing pictures of their dysfunctional family trip to the Grand Canyon in 2002. But there are the positives too. You can reconnect and with people whose lives have taken different paths and now cross yours again. So it effectively reunites.

And then there are blogs where the author has the audacity to force readers to subscribe to his or her ridiculousness ramblings of incoherent thoughts on some ridiculous or unnecessary topic. It’s a one-way forum for communicating information about one’s family or beliefs on topics without the risk of hearing the devil’s advocate position. But no one does that, do they? (sarcasm) Again, there are positives, blogs are a great way to add color to life and share or retell a story to others who may not be within earshot or zipcode.

But out of what I’ve mentioned above and even left out, email is the greatest. It has become your signature. “What’s your email address? I’ll email you.” Or when you visit an e-commerce site, you enter your email address to complete the transaction and you’re emailed the bill. The fallout is your email address is intercepted by some of the most wholesome people and businesses. I love the random emails I then get from ‘people.’ And in those messages, I love the horribly written text which is clearly not transcribed by someone with English as a first language.

The other day, I learned that an Iraqi business tycoon made a $17.5M deposit in a United Arab Emirates bank account in 2006. That Iraqi tycoon has recently passed away and the account manager for the deceased has feverishly been scouring the world for the tycoon’s next of kin. Unfortunately, the search and his efforts ‘have proved abortive’ (see below). So the account manager is in desperate need of an individual he can trust. He’s willing to back door the UAE bank system and transfer the funds to me due to the dissatisfaction with the exhaustive effort of the government confiscating funds from possible terrorist activities. All he needs is my trust and account information.

Without further adieu, here is the email I received from Mr. George Abraham:

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Dearest,

This letter must come to you as a big surprise, but I believe it is only a day that people meet and become great friends/ business partners. I am, currently Head of Corporate Affairs Department with a reputable bank here in United Arab Emirates. I write you this proposal in good faith, believing that I can trust you with the information I am about to reveal to you.

I have an urgent and very confidential business proposition for you. On November 1st, 2006, an Iraqis business tycoon Mr. Mohammed Hussein made a (Fixed deposit) valued at US$17,500,000.00 (Seventeen Million Five hundred Thousand Dollars only) in my bank and I happen to be his account officer before I was moved to my present position recently. The maturity date for this deposit contract was last April 2010. Before this date, I have tried my possible best to locate a Next of Kin to late Mr. Mohammed, but all efforts proved abortive, because all his family died in the recent Iraq war that took peoples life and properties

With the recent change of government in the country and with their efforts to support the United Nations in checkmating terrorism aid in UAE and middle east, the Government have pass a new Financial Control Law which will give the Government authority to interrogate or confiscate any account fixed deposit or current with any bank of above $5 million Dollars to explain the source of the funds, making sure it is not for terrorism support. If I do not move this money out of the country immediately, by end of the fiscal year, the Government will definitely confiscate the money, because my bank cannot provide the account owner to explain the source of the money since he is late.

I decided to utilize this life time opportunity, instead of Government confiscating the fund, but I cannot directly claim the money without the help of a foreigner and that is why I am contacting you for an assistance. As the Account Officer to late Mr. Mohammed, coupled with my present position and status in the bank, I have the power to influence the release of the funds to any foreigner that comes up as the Next of Kin to the account, with the correct information concerning the account, which I shall give you. I am having the secret Code for the account, which only the account owner or his Next of Kin can know. I shall supply all necessary information we need for the claim and there is practically no risk involved, the transaction will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of law, beside United Arab Emirate is porous and anything goes.

If you accept to work with me, I want you to state how you wish us to share the funds in percentage, so that both parties will be satisfied. I shall explain to you in details how we shall handle the transaction once I receive your response. Thanking you in advance and May God bless you. Please, treat with utmost confidentiality. I shall send you copy of the deposit slip issued to Mr. Mohammed when the deposit was made for your perusal. I wait your urgent response.

Regards,
Mr. George Abraham
georgeabraham@zipmail.com.br

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This is totally legit despite the poor use of grammar and inappropriately used verb tenses. I have a couple of concerns though. First, by broadcasting the news of my great fortune left to me by Mr. Mohammed, there’s the concern that people will come out of the woodwork and want a loan and to be my friend, maybe even on a social network. Man, I don’t want my newfound wealth falling in to the wrong hands. I know I can trust Mr. George Abraham with my account numbers and he’ll surely deposit the sum of money into my account, but how can I be sure my wife and kids won’t coerce me into giving them money to buy video games and shoes? Second, Mr. George Abraham writes that I should treat this with ‘utmost confidentiality’. In my haste and anxiety to obtain my millions of inherited Iraqi dollars, I’ve disclosed my personally written letter to the world against better judgment. Now you all can easily masquerade as me using my identity to pass on your account numbers and steal my rightfully inherited money without me knowing.

I better act fast now that you all are aware of my new inheritance. Thank God for technology and that Mr. George Abraham was able to reach me via email.