I once said that I like Christmas. As far as holidays go, it is all right with me. Generally, I despise holidays where I feel some sort of coercion to buy a card at Hallmark. But Christmas is cool with me. For now.

The house feels like the holidays. We have finally started putting a dent in the presents we need to wrap, decorations are everywhere, my wife is currently fabricating sugar cookies, and in the refrigerator are two tons of gingerbread ripening for my traditional creation of a holiday masterpiece. But the one thing on my mind which is causing the holiday season to tread dreadfully close to my edge of impatience and tolerance for Hallmark holidays is the snow.

Yes. I enjoy snowboarding and drunk sledding. But, my tolerance for snow in the urban setting is quite low. As a matter of fact, it's zero. It brings out the idiots in their cars and trucks. With the new addition to our family, son #2, I have been lucky enough to work from home this last week thus avoiding the latest weather pattern. Good thing too as the snow began to fall steadily about a week ago. Occasionally, I have gone out to search out sustenance and supplies. Today was one of those days. Because I worked from home today, I went to the store around 1pm. What I should have realized is that the people who have the ability to drive in the snow and ice were most likely at work during this period and not on the road. Those who were on the road during my journey were those with less skill on the snow and ice than a stampeding angry African rhino. So the drive to and from the store was exciting.

I am sure that I scared some of these 'skilled' travelers with my drifting around corners and snow rooster tails. Ironically, maybe I am one of those guys who you hate to have drive through your neighborhood when the kids are out sledding. Seriously, I was well within the controls of my auto as I do know both mine and the vehicle's limits. Besides, son #1 was in the car and I would not hurt him, even though his incessant questions and lack of shopping speed drove me nuts.

Son #1 is a great kid. He just asks tons of questions in repetition. I know he is a little stir crazy. School was cancelled these last few days and we really haven't done much of anything to let him blow off steam. After arriving home from our shocking journey to the store, I decided to throw him outside and let him play in the some 10" of snow in the yard. I joined the him and we decided that would build a snowman. One thing to note is that in my house, we don't follow the rules. We build big snowmen with mohawks, bad attitudes, earrings and that drink beer. So son #1 and I set out to build our punk rock snowman. I had him start rolling the snow balls. The snow was wet enough to pack pretty well and soon enough I had to roll the balls for him.


It was a great time putting this bad ass together. It was equally fun to watch people’s looks as they passed by when we put the arms on and added a bottle of beer. Next was the mohawk. I would have made it a little taller but son #1 was getting board and needed a few snow balls thrown at him. I took care of this need as any good father would and satisfied the desires of my oldest child. He asked for it so I delivered. Throughout the snowman building process, son #1 was obsessed with a damn carrot nose. Over and over, 'we need a carrot nose.' So I obliged him. We added rocks as eyes to keep it authentic.


Ultimately, it was a great experience building a punk rock snowman with son #1. We were rude to other neighbors, threw snowballs at each other, made snow angels (I am spiritual), and built a pretty sick snowman. Of course, to keep things honest, my wife had to ask me if there was ‘anything that she should be aware of that might offend people’ out there. I will never tell. Son #1 and I made the best out of a cold situation and ridding our feeling of house arrest. And to think, we are going to build a snow fort tomorrow. Maybe we can throw some snowballs at cars too.